This is a question that pierces the minds of all, it comes in many forms, with many outcomes. The WHY question I think about tonight is WHY ME? The good, the bad and the ugly follow this question.

We want to know why things happen to us, things that seemingly we have no control over. Things like when a man walks into a church and kills  innocent people, or when a young man walks into an Elementary school and takes the lives of children. No matter where lives are taken, young and old, male and female, Christians or Muslims, those in the United States or in Villages in Kabul, the taken of innocent lives make little sense to any sane person. So why? Why do these things happen?

Today I watched a video that made me think why? A coach wanted his students to learn the meaning of privilege, to understand that some have opportunities that others do not. He told them that he was going have a race, where the winner would get the clean and fresh $100 he was holding in his hand, but before the race was to start he has some questions to ask. If you answered “Yes” to any of these question you got to take two steps towards the finish line.

There were many questions, but they went something like this; If your parents are still married take two steps. If you never have to worry about food take two steps. If you never had to work to help support your family take two steps. The questions went on and on, till many of the students were nearly to the finish line, while others hadn’t even taken a step. After the last question the race began…..

I think we all know that the winner of the race was a privileged kid, not the fastest, or maybe even the hardest working, but the one with the most opportunity. This is very much like the life we live, the “Haves” and the “Have Nots”. So, why me? Why do I get opportunities while others don’t, or why am I the one on the starting line with no chance of winning.

I believe the answer to this question of “WHY ME?” has no short term answer. I believe the the answer to this question comes later in life, when we begin to realize that all of those times that I asked “why me?” were the times that “Shaped me”. They were the times that “grew me” or “held me” back.

When we ask this question, our response is either our power or our prison. When we look at the WHY ME, and we wallow and blame, or hide and cower, we find ourselves looking through the bars of life. Yet, when we ask WHY ME and we feel its weight against us and we rise and fight, those bars turn to ladders that help us from the hole we are in. We dig through the darkness to find the light shining above just waiting for us to arrive. So, I believe the why is because that is the opportunity that lies in wait for us to find.

I know, you are thinking, what about those poor souls whose lives were taken, what about them? Why them, why were they taken, they were good kind people that in their death could not gain…right?

I cannot say that I know with certainty that this is the case for all, but the day I died on that cold winter morning in 1991, I realized that I learned from death as I did in life and that if I did not come back that day that my spirit was stronger because of my death, and my family, would be okay, not without pain or sorrow, but opportunity to grow from their loss.


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